Better Days

changing seasons

Every day is different. Even people living a completely ritualized existence will need to acknowledge this fact.  If nothing else, think about weather.  There may be places on earth where the weather is the same every day, but I doubt it.  Even if you live alone in the woods you are still part of an ecosystem that is in a constant state of flux. None of us is exempt from external influences.  We are all interconnected in this way.  Each of us is just a small part of a larger whole where we frequently find ourselves being impacted by circumstances beyond our control. This can be a blessing or a curse depending on your point of view.

Some of us welcome change.  These folks are constantly seeking something different and may even get bored or restless when things seem to stay the same for too long.  Others (and this is most of us) hate change, resisting even the smallest manifestations.  We like consistency because it gives us a sense of predictability reinforcing our illusion of control.  If we believe we can rely on things as they are, we don’t have to fear the unknown.  This fear is really just anxiety that we won’t be able to handle whatever changes occur in the future.

Despite this sense of anxiety there is not a single person among us who can look back through their lives and not see evidence of an ability to handle change.  We’ve all faced changes at some point in our lives regardless of our age.  In fact, small children change on a daily basis and usually manage to adapt.  As we age, we may become more invested in the status quo.  Yet we can still find even more examples of accepting change.  We may have been dragged kicking and screaming into a different scenario from the one we were used to, but still most of us find a way eventually to see things as they are and adjust.  Sometimes change brings hidden blessings which may not be recognized immediately but might become evident in hindsight.  Looking back can sometimes help us move forward when change is required.

Sometimes change is forced on us for one reason or another.  At other times the status quo itself is causing our suffering and we need to create our own change.  This can be difficult.  Inertia is a powerful force.  Also, just as changes in the world impact our own personal lives, so changes we make to our personal lives can impact the lives of others.  This doesn’t make those changes good or bad, right or wrong.  But it does help to remember that all decisions have consequences, some unexpected and unanticipated.  Being willing to accept and deal with the consequences whatever they are is one of the characteristics of resilience.  This is a quality defined by Webster’s Dictionary as “the ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.”  You may have heard the saying “pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.” Resilience is one of the traits that help us deal with the pain without buying into the suffering.

So what does all of this have to do with yoga, Pilates or exercise in general, my usual themes?  Basically it’s this – since each day is different and change is all around us all of the time, our practice can be impacted.  One of the many benefits of practice is that it helps us to deal with stress.  Practice can be an anchor in a raging sea of change.  There can be a comfort in the experience of simple breath and movement.  One of the things I often tell students is that if you really focus on connecting breath and movement there is usually no room in your head for anything else.  This can provide a brief respite from the ills of the world.  In fact, practice might help you to remember that in this moment right now there is still alot that is OK.  We as humans seem to naturally gravitate to noticing what’s wrong more often than what is right. Those of you who take my classes know that at the end of each class I always offer gratitude for being able to move and breathe.  This is something I learned from yoga teacher Seane Corn and I am grateful to her for passing on that tip.  It has served me well.

Another consequence of daily changes is that some days are better than others physically as well as mentally.  As we get older, we tend to focus on the negative aspects of these feelings, but they are not limited to older people.  Everyone has days when they feel like they could conquer the world and other days when staying in bed seems like the only option.  On days like that it helps to remember that practice can be a source of comfort.  If you take classes regular, the group can also be a support.  Just like you feel differently on some days, your practice can be different, too.  If you’re not feeling terribly energetic or if you are bogged down by some difficulty, don’t blow off your practice. Instead allow it to change just as you are changing.  Be gentle.  Take it slow.  Don’t work so hard.  Bend your knees more.  Try using an extra blanket or other prop to make it less stressful.  Or just take Child’s Pose and breathe whenever you feel like it. You can also just completely avoid poses that are painful or difficult.  Or use modifications even if that’s something you rarely do.  There are no expectations you need to live up to. Your practice is for you alone.  There may be a benefit to others due to the effects of your practice on you, but that’s not the point.  The ultimate goal is for you to take care of yourself.  So just for today whatever will help you do that is the right thing to do.  Tomorrow will be different.

Yes – Yoga is for You!

lotusopti
Peace and Freedom

As a strong advocate of yoga for all, I am somewhat disturbed by the proliferation of images that portray yoga as more like gymnastics than the cultivation of a mind/body connection.  Yoga was originally developed as a contemplative practice to assist with the physical demands of seated meditation.  Somewhere along the line certain branches of the practice have taken a turn to the athletic.  In fact there has been a movement in recent years to make yoga a competitive sport.  This is fine for some. Unfortunately, however, this tends to intimidate people who think they are too old or infirm or inflexible or whatever to do yoga.  That, of course, is completely untrue.  One does not need to be flexible to do yoga. Although yoga will not alter genes or inherent physical attributes, it can improve flexibility and encourage greater mobility in regular practitioners.  Fortunately, there is also a growing segment of the yoga community that is advancing the practice of yoga as therapy, expanding on its roots as an inner as well as outer practice.

The keys to experiencing the benefits of yoga, both physically and mentally, are letting go of expectations and maintaining a consistent practice.  It is entirely possible that you will never be able to touch your toes in a forward fold.  But here’s a revelation – it doesn’t matter!  If you practice forward folds consistently, they will become more comfortable and you will experience their benefits.  These include calming the nervous system, quieting the mind, and helping to relieve stress and anxiety. Forward bends also stretch the hamstrings and calves, notoriously tight areas for most of us that can lead to additional problems in the hips, knees and lower back.  And now for another revelation: according to a Yoga Journal article by long time yoga teacher Baxter Bell “90% of people [need help] doing [forward bends] safely”.  So if forward bends are a problem for you, you are certainly not alone.  This is what props are for.  Using props is not a sign of weakness.  It is a sign of self-love, self-compassion and finding the joy that accompanies true acceptance of reality.   Remember also that today’s reality is transient just like everything else.  So accepting and accomodating the reality of today doesn’t have to mean forever.  Just for today practice they way that feels best for you.  That may change tomorrow.  Or it may not.  But today is the most important day.  It deserves your attention.

It doesn’t help that we live in a culture that does not value aging.  Youth is celebrated to the extent that we are constantly bombarded with images that implore us to deny the natural – and inescapable – reality of changing physical bodies.  Instead we are encouraged to follow the next great product or procedure to the impossibility of eternal youth.  We find ourselves falling into the trap of denying reality and living with the false hope that we can avoid change or return to some magical time when everything was perfect.  It’s amazing what hindsight allows us to believe.  The fact is that just by virtue of having lived longer than younger people we have accumulated a certain amount of wisdom simply through experience.  Sometimes the noise of the youth culture becomes so overwhelming that we, too, forget to value this wisdom.  Here are some quotes from one of the founders of modern yoga, B.K.S. Iyengar:

“Do not look at others’ bodies with envy or with superiority.  All people are born with different constitutions.  Never compare with others.  Each one’s capacities are a function of his or her internal strength.  Know your capacities and continually improve upon them.”

“Action is movement with intelligence. The world is filled with movement. What the world needs is more conscious movement. . .”

Yoga Journal and Yoga Alliance recently completed a study titled 2016 Yoga in America.  Highlights include documentation of the increase in yoga participation throughout the U.S. even in remote and rural areas.  This is not exactly big news to most of us, but some of the statistics are surprising. Among them, more men are practicing yoga.  Also the number of participants aged 55 and older has increased by a whopping 10 million people in the 4 years since 2012 (from 4 million in 2012 to 14 million in 2016).  The article anticipates that this population “may usher in a wave of softer and more meditative practices.”  Fortunately, this is already happening.  Those of you who are lumping all yoga classes into some broad category of sun salutations and arm balances would do well to take a second look.  Most studios offer a variety of classes.  Check out the descriptions or speak with an instructor before making assumptions about what you can and can’t do.  The study also points to the increase in the number of trained yoga teachers.  For every current teacher, there are 2 more who are training to be teachers. This means that there is a choice in teachers.  So if you try a class and don’t like it, my first suggestion is to try again.  Everyone has a bad day and your own anxiety could have been part of your judgment.  If you still don’t like the class, try a different teacher.  American yoga has greatly expanded on the original methods of yoga that came from India.  Today there are so many styles and teachers bring many different backgrounds and interests to their classes.  So don’t give up.  With a little patience and persistence you will likely find a practice that works for you.

Finally, the study cites all of the benefits enjoyed by yoga practioners.  These include a more positive self-image, increased likelihood to be active in other ways, relief of stress and overall health improvement.  Those who take classes also have the benefit of community.  So if you are new or returning to yoga after an absence, be kind to yourself.  Let the past go.  Just for today, accept where you’re at right now.  Don’t try to push yourself beyond your capacity.  Pay attention to your own body and listen to what it is telling you.  Use props and make adjustments as needed.  And accept support.  Ask your teacher for help with whatever accommodations you might need.  Don’t compare yourself to anyone else.  Regardless of what you think your poses look like, you are a real yogi just like all other practitioners.  Relax and enjoy!  You, too, deserve the benefits of yoga.