accepting reality

It’s Not Life and Death – It’s Yoga!

by ultrapeg
meditation23opti
Peace

It continues to sadden me when I hear people say that they are afraid to try a yoga or Pilates class because their inexperience or perceived inability will hold back the rest of the class.  This is a topic I have addressed before but because it so frequently recurs, it is worth another look.  When these kinds of thoughts get stuck in one’s mind it can be difficult to dislodge them, but here are some possible strategies to try.

A recent article in Yoga Journal cited anxiety disorders as the most “common mental illness in the United States”. Although anxiety experts often recommend yoga and other mindfulness practices as an antidote for anxiety, the paradox of anxiety over “doing it right” and can create an insurmountable wall.  Here’s a possible solution:  keep it simple!  Remind yourself that you don’t have to do everything included in the class just because it’s there.  Pick and choose.  Skip parts that make you nervous.  Simply take a break and rest.  Or try watching and listening to the instructor so that you might be able to try that move another time.  You can also speak with the instructor after class and see if there is another way to get the same benefit.  The purpose of a mind-body practice is for each person to develop their own inner connections.  This requires practicing individual internal focus.  When you’re focussed on yourself it is difficult to pay any attention to what anyone else is doing. So chances are no one else is watching you.

Another strategy I use frequently is the 15-minute rule.  This can be applied to any task that seems overwhelming. Tell yourself you will only do whatever it is for 15 minutes.  Then if you’re still really uncomfortable or unhappy you can stop.  You can either choose to take a break as discussed above.  Or you can leave.  The doors to my classes are never locked.  Anyone can leave at any time.  If you’re still feeling OK at the 15-minute mark, give yourself another 15 minutes.  Before you know it, you’ll have made it through the entire class and still be OK.  Amazing! If 15 minutes is still too daunting, make it 10 minutes. Set your own rules.

Allow your curiousity to flow with your practice. Instead of forcing a particular pose because you think it’s supposed to look a certain way, try experimenting.  Maybe an approximation can feel just as good.  After all that is the goal here – to feel good!  Recently I have been leading an exercise class in a local nursing home.  Among other things, we have been practicing getting up from a chair without using our hands. One lady was so successful she could even come to standing.  I told her that regular practice of this technique would keep her strong.  She said, “Why do I need to be strong?  We’re all going to die.”  No argument there.  But the fact is that we are engaging in these practices because we are all currently living.  And every day that we feel good and live well is a good day.  While we’re here we might as well feel as good as we can.  Life can be a mine field.  Whatever we can do to assist with navigation is worth doing.

Change is another powerful force to keep in mind.  Everything changes all the time.  Ourselves included.  Even when we don’t notice it, each one of us changes every day.  That means that each day you are starting from a different place from the day before.  And always you have to start where you’re at.  Some days you may feel great and everything comes easily with surprisingly few obstacles.  The next day may be totally different causing you to get down on yourself for having lost the capacity that seemed so available yesterday.  But the reverse can also happen. Something you’ve struggled with seemingly forever can suddenly become accessible.  This is a great feeling that can make all the pain of getting there fade away.  But even this is subject to change.  So leave the past behind where it belongs and instead explore the wonder of who you are today.  Then go from there.  Take it slow if you need to or dive in if you need the challenge.  Once again, you’re in charge.  Do what works for you.

Of course, there is also my favorite concept – practice.  That is my mantra.  Remember the old saw – what does it take to get to Carnegie Hall? Practice, practice, practice.  That does not mean that any of us will ever be perfect.  And there may be other people who will always be better at whatever it is than we are.  But regular practice of will result in improvement.  And improvement feels good!

Finally, it is worth reminding everyone that this is not a matter of life and death – it’s yoga.  Lighten up, folks.  Don’t take yourselves so seriously.  Do you know what children do when they fall out of a balance pose?  They giggle.  And then they try again.  There’s a lesson there. This is all about having fun.  In my ultrarunning days I would often arrive at aid stations and hear the volunteers there comment on how cheerful I looked even in the worst of conditions.  My response was always, “I’m in this for recreation.  When I stop having fun I will stop doing it.”  And, in fact, that’s what I did.  Yoga and Pilates have been my mainstays ever since.  You are all welcome to join me any time.

The Mystery of Life

by ultrapeg

Easter is upon us.  Also Passover, Norwuz (Persian New Year),  and the Pagan celebration of Ostara.  And there is the Vernal Equinox and May Day and numerous other ancient traditions for recognizing the end to the dormancy of winter and the renewal of Spring.  The days are longer.  Even in the harshest of climates the temperatures begin to moderate.  New life emerges from the ground.  In this time of changing climate when daily weather details are particularly uncertain, Spring still comes.  The sun descends from our sky every evening and rises above whatever horizon we are able to view every morning.  This is the cycle:  life appears and disappears from our limited view.  We don’t know where life comes from or where it goes.  But we do know that it arises and passes beyond our control.  As George Harrison sang, “Life goes on within you and without you.”  Try as we may to effect the outcome, life does what it wants to do.

Certainly we as a species have improved the human condition.  We have recognized some causes of some diseases and found ways for some of us to survive them.   But new ones arise.  And even though people through the ages have hoped to claim otherwise, we still have no cure for death.  It faces every living creature on earth.  We don’t know why or what it means.  But we do know for sure that it will happen to all of us.  None of us know when or how.  This can be a source of great anxiety.  Or it can be a reminder that the life we are given through no merit or fault of our own is precious.

This past week a dear friend left this life.  He was a large strapping man who seemed to exude life.  Perpetually cheerful and generous he spread joy to all those he encountered.  No one who knew him could imagine him being sick.  Yet his illness came on suddenly and overwhelmed his human body in a very short period of time.  As some of you know I spent last year in treatment for cancer yet, for now at least, I have recovered.  So how does this happen?  Why does one life dissipate when another continues?  It’s not attributable to anything we understand.  Not talent, not genes, not strength or skill or pleading.  I refuse to use the war metaphors of “battle” and “fighting”.  It’s not about that either.  It just happens.   Accidents happen.  Illness happens.  Some bodies succumb; others survive.  Paraphrasing Alfred, Lord Tennyson, “Ours not to reason why; ours but to do and die.”

Of course I’m sad for those of us who remain here on earth having to continue to move through our lives without the physical presence of the friend and family member who is no longer with us.  Still I am so grateful to have been a part of his life and to have had him in mine.  At times it can be so difficult to remember to value those around us.  Everyone on this planet is just muddling through.  None of us knows what we’re doing here.  And that goes for every human being of every race, religion, gender or political persuasion in every corner of the earth where we exist.  It never ceases to amaze me how life in general, and people in particular can be found all over the planet in the most astounding circumstances. Once life appears, the instinct to survive is paramount and universal.

There are forces in the universe that we may never understand.  Yet somehow we need to find a way to accept and coexist with these forces as well as with each other.  Even if we somehow manage to tame some of these elements, we can’t make them go away.  We’ve all experienced losses of many types.  We fear disease, disaster and more loss.   The fear drives us to be suspicious of each other in the name of finding safety.  This is an illusion.  We all face the same challenges and mysteries.  But we are also resilient creatures who keep striving to find a way to make what we can work for us.  Maybe we can begin to recognize that same instinct in everyone around us even when the methods look different.  As humans we have an amazing capacity for cooperation.  Times of loss are an especially good time to remember cooperation works so much better than alienation.  Fear won’t save us.  But love can help ease the transitions.  My friend loved and was loved.  A noble legacy.